but here's one reason i posted a while ago - fuckin slags the lot of em
every time i receive a call at work form a scouser the questions they
ask me involve a series of duplicitous motivations.
for 1 thing, i have yet to receive a call from a scouser who doesn't
ask me if they can somehow 'not pay' for the thing they are purchasing from
us. they always ask for a form - some magic piece of paper that must be
ubiquitous on merseyside - that they can sign and use to persuade my
company that they deserve a freebie. this is usually because they are
unemployed - or, more likely, unemployable.
the thing that really bugs me is that the other day some woman working
for a well-known bank in liverpool overheard a conversation about the
existence of a fund in my organisation that has been set up to help the
people of manchester to gain access to education and training and so
improve their future prospects (of not having to move to liverpool
mainly). since then we've been inundated with calls from - get this -
fully and gainfully employed scousers (ok, ok i accept that the term
'employed' and 'scouser' seems a paradox but it does happen somehow or
other) attempting to use this fund for the advancement of their
careers.
I'm just disgusted by this and yet not surprised. recently a freind
pointed out a study into local dialects in the UK. every diallect bar
scouse was weakening. in other words, the gutteral, foul, saliva
rolling, disease-spreading accent that is the communication method of the
merseysider is the one single diallect that is wallowing in it's own
crapulence and snowballing.
at the open golf championship in liverpool there was a new kind of
golf-buggy - one with 2 wheels. it was reported in 1 of the newspapers
that upon seeing this new contraption one particularly witty scouse cad
remarked 'it had 4 wheels before it came to liverpool'. ho-ho-ho. how many times has each scouser used the city's reputation for theft, burglary and breaking and entering as a source of humour? this humour is, at first, seemingly self-depracating, yet is in fact self-aggrandising in nature.
the fact is, scousers are proud of their long history of underachievement
and criminal activity.